Sometimes animals know when their time is up and they go off into the wild to die. Your house could be the wilds.. Just saying it dont look good for him right now
Yes, that’s the male penguins bedroom light on for hours while he’s watching TV in the living room. I guess it would be too much exercise to turn the light switch on the wall on and off. Must be nice to have free electric!
My wife, her cheapskate brother, and my oldest son with his family went to the beach for the once a month bonfire. I guess the Penguins had scrambled eggs for dinner. That’s what it looks like sitting in the sink when I came in the house. The coffee cup? I don’t know. It’s been there all day, sitting right above the dishwasher.
Isn’t Karma hell? My wife took the female penguin to the grocery store. The female penguin bought a six pack of cupcakes. She dropped them in the parking lot upside down as she was putting them in the car. Doesn’t look like it messed up the taste of them though. I see three of them are missing.
Oh well, I better get my day started. I can hear the female penguin inside the house hacking away as usual, every morning. PS, As far as I know nobody fell down last night and peed themselves. I quit using that bathroom after they put a booster seat on the toilet yesterday. I don’t know if there’s **** all over the place.
Wow, way too funny. I walked in the house to clean material though. I noticed the entire kitchen had been cleaned. I walked in my wife’s bedroom and Esther, who cleaned the kitchen? She said I did. I just smiled and laughed. She smiled too.
Wow, way too disgusting! My brother-in-law came out of the bathroom, you all know, the cheapskate, he said, “That felt great!” Hadn’t had a shower in 3 days.” WTF!!! That is disgusting!
I think I told you all that my wife cleaned up the entire kitchen. The male penguin apparently had a cup of coffee and a bowl of cereal. I wonder what’s wrong with that thing Patrick calls, “the sloshy thing.” I guess it takes too much effort to put their dishes in the dishwasher. Unbelievable
“Dad needs to come down here and exercise, otherwise he’s going to die.“ He came outside for less than two minutes. Now he’s sitting in the living room. It’s close to 80° and beautiful blue skies. Interesting… I’m not 100% positive, but I think he’s walked around the block two times in almost a week. Maybe he’s saving up energy for his after lunch nap.
Speaking of lunch, the male penguin just came outside and walked all the way to the front porch. I didn’t hear the conversation but I know exactly what it was. Apparently I’ve heard these words way too many times in my life come out of his mouth.” Jane, I’m getting a little bit hungry.“ “What would you like dear?” If I said that to my wife she would very quickly reply back, GFY!
Earlier this week my wife bought him a walker because he kept falling down. I haven’t seen him use it yet. I don’t know how much it cost, but it sure seems like it was a waste of money. If he falls down in front of me I’m going to tell him, should’ve used your walker that I bought!
The female penguin just came outside and asked if she could open up the back doors and let some heat in. She said it’s so dark and cold inside the house. Last time I walked through it was 72°. Just wondering what you up north people keep your thermostat at? I haven’t turned the heat on yet this year, and 72° feels great! So I told her, sure, you can open the back doors. I neglected to tell her when it hits 74° inside the house the air conditioner will come on. Cracking myself up!
One down, two to go.... I can't believe I survived yesterday. I had to spend too much time with my BSing brother in-law. That mini penguin is just full of it. Now I can understand why 3 wives left him! First his cheapness, at least to me. Friday we actually cut through the Walgreens parking lot for a short cut. I said, need anything? His answer, Nope. I thought maybe he'd buy me some beer to replace all the beer he's bummed off of me. Oh heck no. I know he's seen my "look" when he goes in the garage to get one of my beers. Friday afternoon he was going in the house stealing my wife's beers. Go figure. Saturday, We're going boating. He tells my son he'll buy the beer and ice. Can you believe he bought a 12 pack of beer and 1 bag of ice for four guys on a boat??? My son sent him back in the store to get more ice, and my son bought more beer. I ALWAYS bring my own beer wherever I go. No way do I depend on other's or mooch! We go for a little boat ride and then we're going to meet the rest of the family at a restaurant on the water. We're all seated at the restaurant. Kevin the cheapskate orders one of their most expensive steaks. You're going to love this... He orders it well done. YUCK! It looks more like medium than well done, but he says it's fine. He barely ate half of it and said he was done. It sure didn't look like he ate it all! Bill time... You're going to love this... His bill is like $50. He tells his mom who is sitting by him, I don't have any cash on me. I'll pay you back later. WHAT??? His mommy and daddy paid for his expensive, half eaten meal. Good grief!!! I've got more to say about this boating trip but it's too nice of a day to be sitting here typing. I'll be back tonight with the rest of the story...
After dinner the land people went back home by vehicle, and the four of us, my son, my nephew, the cheap ass, and I went for an evening boat cruise. We went to downtown West Palm Beach. The three of them we’re going to go cruise downtown, check out some chicks, and have a drink. I don’t know what the cheap-a*s drank, but his bill was $33. Go figure, he didn’t have money to pay for his meal, but he has money to buy drinks. Amazing! I didn’t go walking with them because I’ve had a bad cold for the last week. Yesterday was one of my better days, but by evening I was plum out of energy.
So we leave downtown West Palm Beach and head north back towards the boat ramp. Along the way we stopped at a friend of my sons who lives on a sailboat in the intracoastal waterway. Ian was very happy to see us because you don’t get a lot of visitors when you live on a sailboat. His girlfriend was there, Mayra, and we never met before but she was really really nice. We all went into the cabin of the sailboat and partied for a while. The best part about that, Kevin was claustrophobic and left! I guess I need to get myself a sailboat and stay in the cabin. We hung out with Ian and his girlfriend for at least a couple hours. Very interesting hanging out on the sailboat. For you Up North people the weather was beautiful. I would say it was in the mid 70s. I’m wearing a sweatshirt because of my cold. I was cold. Everyone else had T-shirts.
We moved over to Alex‘s boat after a while because my big hearted son felt we were excluding Kevin from the festivities. Too bad.
We got home around midnight. Alex and Nephew Tommy went their way. I popped open another beer and sat on my picnic table for a minute. Kevin, out of beer, and not going into the garage to steal anymore of mine, went in the house. Yay! I went over to neighbor John’s house across the street. He was still working on his truck. We hung out for a little while and then I went home and went to bed. I didn’t wake up till 12:30 this afternoon. That was perfect. I totally missed saying goodbye to Kevin. He went home to Cincinnati where I hope he is freezing to death. That’s why my title at the beginning of today’s thread was One down, two to go. I don’t know the exact departure date for the rest of the penguins, but it better not be any longer than two weeks from today. If it’s not there’s going to be one grumpy homeowner. I still haven’t hooked the inside TV to the outside antenna so they have no local channels. You know what that means next weekend? If I don’t have the antenna hooked up they have a no Super Bowl. LMAO! Y’all have a great night!!! Just a reminder, don’t forget the male penguin came down here so he could walk and get exercise. As I said previously, he’s taken two walks around the block in seven days. Needs the exercise, my a*s!
