Just in case you thought I was drunk and rambling last night, I will prove you wrong. Here are three front seatbelt covers. As you can see in the first picture they are very very dingy, dirty, and dull looking. After using the 3M rubbing compound with wax in it you can clearly see they're very shiny. It's seriously works miracles on chrome aluminum and stainless steel. I'll be back later with irritating penguin chatter. Oh heck, I might as well start right now. This morning I'm searching around for my water bottle out in the porch or picnic area. The female asked me what color is it? I looked her right in the face and said, Jane, it is a water bottle. It is clear it has no color. It is 71 right now at noon It's going to be warmer this afternoon. She comes out, dressed in jeans and a sweater type shirt and tells me, it is not that cold outside. I want it so bad to say "No sheet!" I'm in the garage wearing shorts and a t-shirt. I know it sounds petty, but it is just never ending! Big penguin used to say "Shut up Jane!" Sure do wish I could.
Good to see you getting stuck in - to me that be the best case scenario escape from a housefull of penguins. As you are making things shiny be grateful your Penguins aren't Wekas or you'd be in trouble. Washed half the house this arvo with the missus, it's 90 out. Came in to mix her a drink and thought of your plight. 32 c = 89.6 f and yes the time is correct;-)
Sadly, Florida Rabbits are stupid. We have a roughly 40' by 40' fenced area that we call the "Citrus grove", It actually has one Lemon tree and two Banana Plants. The dogs have access to it. We had about five wild Rabbits on our property. All five decided at one time or another that they wanted to be in the Citrus grove. We now have no wild rabbits. I kinda liked them...
Why does every day begin and end the same way? All I want to say is "Get the F out of the way!!!" Yesterday I'm working on the car in the garage. I actually told the male penguin I was busy and can't talk right now. He says, "That's ok. I'll stay out of the way." He didn't! He literally stood right at the gate to the side of the garage blocking my path!!! More, "Get the F out of the way!!!" This morning was the same thing. Next I'm putting stuff up in the attic. He says, "I'd help you but I can't lift anything. No sheet! He had surgery a few years ago and did NOT do his therapy exercises. Now his arm is useless!!! Would you believe last year when I was doing my therapy exercises he'd tell me, "Don't over do it." I'd just look at his limp arm and think, ya... how'd that work out for you? At least it's a crappy day outside. Maybe they will both stay in the house. Maybe!
I just finished lunch. He didn't even stare at me... that much. What? The male is sooo lazy. When his wife is around he says, "Hey Jane. I'm starting to get a little hungry." That means make me lunch. She makes him lunch. If she makes him a sandwich when he is finished he just gets up and leaves his mess on the counter. Paper towel, napkin, glass he drank from, and crumbs. Saturday his wife went to the store. I made myself lunch. He comes in the kitchen and I know he's staring at me like a dog with sad eyes. I did not look up. If I looked up he'd say something like, "What are you eating?" I'd love to say, Are you F---ing blind!" I just kept looking down, playing with my phone. He finally walked away.
His name is Dick. His wife always uses his name in questions. "Have you seen Dick?" If he's napping and I go to the back of the house she'll say, "Is Dick up?" She told me once that since he's gotten older "Dick gets tired a lot now." Finding out his name is Dick... We were visiting one Christmas. My son was 2. Jane kept talking about Dick. My son was standing next to me. He tugs on my pants. I looked down at him and he quietly said, "Grandpa's name is Dick!" I said, "Yes", and we both busted out laughing!!! The first time I met my neighbor he introduced himself. He said, "My name is Richard, and I'm not a Dick." I busted out laughing and said, My brother's name is Richard and he is a dick!!!" Names are funny.....
Day 245 held in captivity at my own home. Last night the female penguin made stuffed pork chops, potatoes, and broccoli. The Grandkids didn't like the stuffing. She made it out of stale hamburger buns. I thought it tasted like stale buns too, but I was hungry! The potatoes weren't completely cooked. Kinda hard, but they tasted good. The best part... they did all the dishes, pots, and pans. So I'm really not complaining. I've gone back and read some of my posts. Geese, sometimes I sound like a real complainer! I'm really not. I guess it's being stuck with them that does me in. The female just doesn't shut up! The male is ok, but you're not going to get me to say, "I like Dic-." No way Jose!
Dick... Today's word of the day is "inflection." How you say something. Every morning when I see him I say, "Good morning Richard." I just can't bring myself to say, "Good morning Dick." It just doesn't sound right. He wanted to help me mow the grass. More no way. I have to many sprinklers. Some of them cost almost 20 bucks now. Rip off! Anyhow I didn't want him mowing all my beer money away, plus a trip to Home Depot. So I told him he could paint my new mailbox post. He asked for a rag in case he got paint on the mailbox. I took the 4 screws holding it on to the post off and put the mailbox on the ground. There, no messup possible. When I walked away I said, "Thank you Dick." Whoa.... inflection. That could have come out wrong! Back to work.....
Yesterday was GREAT! Maybe today will be better!!! I had a great day yesterday. (That means I didn't spend much time at home dealing with the penguins!) First thing in the morning I took my Grandson to school. Then I came home for just a minute. GSFred gave an invite to come over and check out his car. I stopped by my son's house and picked him up. We got to Fred's house and sure enough, there was this beautiful 67 GS400, 4 speed, convertible sitting in his garage. My son and I both agree, Fred is very humble. He acts as though his car is only a 5. When in reality it is drop dead gorgeous!!! We had a blast hanging out with Fred. I am honored to call him my friend! Fred is not old. What? What I mean is his house was a very comfortable 72 degrees. The house I left, my house, was a "nursing home" stagnant, 78 degrees. I am soooo tired of living in a hot house!!! These penguins literally sit on the couch all day wearing sweat shirts and complaining it is chilly. If I lower the thermostat on the A/C they start squawking up a storm! Annoying!!! I'm leaving the house to take my Grandson to school. The female's phone goes off with an Amber alert. She is trying to read me the entire Amber alert as I'm walking out the door. Believe me, I feel bad hearing about a missing kid, but this alert came from 3 counties away, and I'm not going to see the missing child on the way to my Grandson's school. She continued reading the alert even as I was walking out the door. I could still hear her on the other side of a closed door!!! 4 words come to mind. Shut the F--- up!!! Hacking... The female penguin caught my wife's cold. I had to listen to her hacking all night long!!! By 5 AM I had enough. I got up and went outside to watch the news. Ahhh!!! It was a very comfortable 67 degrees outside. A little while ago I went in for another cup of coffee. There she is hacking away on the couch. She looks so vulnerable. I can't tell you what kind of terrible thoughts went through my mind. I wish I had a pet alligator, or python, or something exotic that I could set free in the house! Enabler... Sunday morning my wife made crumb cake. Serious!!! Sure, go ahead and make your mom something messy so she can take her little napkin and go spill her crumbs all over the couch and floor!!! I have NOT vacuumed since they have been here, and it looks it! There are crumbs on the kitchen counter, the kitchen floor, the throw rug by the toaster, on top of the toaster oven, and on the way to the female penguins chair. The meatloaf she made 2 Monday's ago... there's little pieces of meat between the kitchen counter and the stove. I can't wait for the roaches to show up. They do every year after her parents get here. Oh well... I gotta go play with my car out front because I can still hear the female hacking inside, and I'm on the back porch. Y'all have a GREAT day!!! Oops, I almost forgot. When I went to pick up my Grandson from school there was this mom. What a mom!!! She was a very pretty blonde with these two big brains trying to bust out of her shirt!!! I gotta make sure I go back today at exactly 2:30. Delicious!!!!!!
You're a good man doing the school run, sounds like such a chore. Saw this photo yesterday and thought of you. Hopefully Dick doesn't get in your way today
Just told my son I have to pick up John from school tomorrow so I can take a pic of the blonde with big brains, but... Now I just heard it's our buddy Jack's birthday tomorrow. So we're going to go to the gentleman's club to get a free lunch, buy 2 beers, and throw a few dollars to hard working women working their way through college. Ya right, I don't believe that crap! We'll see if the male penguin wants to go. He'll probably have a heart attack.
OMG!!! Day 2 of the hacking beach! I slept good last night. I drank a lot of beer and went to my room and passed out. Didn't wake up till morning. But now that I'm awake I hear her hacking. I'm gonna stick something big down her throat. No, no, no! Stop thinking dirty. Maybe a Ford top loader shifter or a 9 inch Ford axle! Sorry Lucas for using only Ford parts. I'm not finished putting my car together so I don't want to use something I might need. In 45 minutes were going to take Jack to lunch at Cheeta's. I told Dick. Dick wants to come. What!!! That's what he said. Years ago my wife's uncle was in town from Ohio. He wanted to go. You Ohio people have to many restrictions. Anyhow we went. The first show was girl on girl. Uncle Ken about sheet himself!!! He said, "That's disgusting!" Then got up and left. At least he paid for our pitcher of beer.
LMFAO! Now he'll be chasing the female penguin (very slowly) around your home. When he catches her, I hope she doesn't call the police and have him arrested for "Assault with a dead weapon".
