This am. my wife and her sister and mom left for South Carolina(for 4 days...Yahoo).They decided to leave at 5 am.I thought I'd help her get her things around and be nice.After a few minutes I got bored and started checking out the V8 board.She entered the room and all she could say is "I'm leaving now,do you think you can take a few minutes to tell me good bye.Who the hell gets on a web site at 4:30 in the morning anyways?""You have a problem buddy!"I then proceeded to tell her that after my GS's she is the most important thing in my life.Not a good thing to say! Seems she is a little crankier early in the morning.She knows the truth that SHE is the most important thing to me,I was trying to get a rise out of her.Before she left I told her to make sure to scour some junkyards for GS parts.Wont tell you the response. The bad news is that I thought I was going to have a freebie weekend until I looked on the table where she left me something.A TO DO LIST! Damn,thought it would be a breeze but now it looks like my whole weekend will be filled with chores. PATou:
computer pat, you lucky man. let me dream a bit. if i had a 4 day weekend to my self heres what id do. id play with my car, drink a few beers, go to moms house for dinner, play with the car some more, and drink a few more beers!
Buick Computer Hi Pat, the answer to your question is ; I do!!! I work 3rd shift and the first thing I do when I get home is see whats happening on the Buick Board. Its nice to do something fun after getting away from work. Chat Later!!! AL :beer
Now here is the "Fritz Option". Much more trouble but infinitely more rewarding :laugh: Get a few dabs of car grease on your hands (mine have PLENTY if you need any:grin: ) Get a good single set of finger prints on the front side of the "To do list" while wrinkling the paper lightly. Leave lots o greasy prints on the back of the sheet and in your messiest hand writing (mine comes naturally) write down the details from one of the ads in the "Cars for sale" section (Phone number,a name,any car). You have just officially set yourself free............. Now you can work on your car the whole time, and ya don't have to pay some neighborhood kid to hang around and cramp your style. When she get's home and see's nothing is done and brings up the list, you just shrug your shoulderso No: "What list Honey"? She probably won't even want to touch the note with a ton of grease on it thus avoiding a step by step reading. Then just tell her,you were working on the car and the phone rang and it was a guy telling you about a killer deal on a GS but his cell phone was going through a no service area, and being the sensitive kinda guy you are, you didn't want to go digging around for a note pad through all her drawers,so you just grabbed the first scrap of paper you could find. And "YEP......that must have been your list Honey"ou: This DOES need to be followed up by " I'm sorry Honey, ya wanna get in the GS, and we can go out and I'll buy us some supper? The car is running great now". p So no chores No paying some kiddo Full time to work on your ride Take the money you were gonna pay that kid and apply it to the supper . Drive your cool car there,sit where you can see it out the window at supper.....drink beer :beer Got it?
I usually spend 15min checking what happened overnight, when I get up at 5:15am. I just set my breakfast on the desk next to the computer and eat while I read.
Oops, almost forgot Call all your buddies who will be coming over and tell them to use your cell phone only, this week-end Remove the house phone from the hook (it will eventually stop making that irritating sound) thus avoiding the party crasher "Check-up phone calls ' which always involve a progress report on your "To do list" If she asks how in THE WORLD the phone got off the hook? Well it's obvious, you were laying in the bed thinking about her,picked up the phone to call her but realized it had gotten to late and you must not have got it back in the cradle good enough and then fell fast asleep Think that covers it all
New To-Do List 1. Leave toilet seat up, urinate off the back deck when possible 2. Stockpile Beer 3. Put feet, in dirty work boots, up on furniture 4. Wash nothing, pick up nothing in the house 5. Use her favorite pillow cases to degrease your car (discretely discard after use) 6. Eat all the gross sh!t she won't normally let you eat, plenty of greasy fried stuff smothered in velveeta 7. Break wind as loud as as often as possible (plan your diet around this- see above) 8. Walk around your house in, at most, your underwear 9. Pick your nose whenever and wherever you damn please, wiping is your perrogative 10. Hang your shirts on doorknobs, the bed posts, anywhere but a hanger. 11. Invite some of your buddies over to watch some "movies" you just rented 12. Smoke cigars with them, while you're at it. 13. Drop your greasy cheicken bones on the polished wood coffee table and wipe your hands on that napkin like thing that they put on the arm of the couch (funny how it matches the couch color) 14. Don't bother removing the hair from the shower strainer 15. Put all fear out of your mind while she's gone. You don't want petty thoughts of the retribution she will bring down upon you to spoil your good time
WELL,I AM GOING TO MAKE ALL OF YOU PROUD!The wife may be P'Od though.:laugh: I only got 2 things done on the To Do List.:laugh: :laugh: But I got several done on you guys' lists.:laugh: :laugh:Heck,on Kens list alone I got #s 1,2,3,6,7(chili dogs,cabbage, beer and boiled eggs)8,9,12 but just can't seem to get that 15 out of the mind now!I even pulled some of Johns things too.I even ate supper on friday night at my moms too.Watched Baseball,Nascar,Football and even a little Horse Racing too.Makes me wonder just what the heck I was thinking of when I decided to get remarried.Now that I think of it I wonder how many of you guys are gonna be willing to be here and defend me when she gets home.Looks like I'll have to bust my butt tomorrow and stop at the florists tomorrow for some flowers.You know though I really missed her while she was gone though.I guess I really love her. Pat
Sounds like you did a Fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine job Pat! Glad you had a good one. I don't think I told you but I was here alone from Friday till tomorrow (Monday) by myself with all 3 of our children. I will have zero excuses however as that was a chore enough riding herd on a 3 against one battle. Actually we had a real good time at the expense of our budget:Brow: Thought I'd offer another little known technique.......when asked to, or it is suggested by your wife that "at least you don't have to make all the trips to the store". First be extremely sensitive and a good listener and INSIST that you go handle the store shopping.ALONE (heh heh).Followed correctly this WILL be the first last time you will have to do this:grin: . Ok, now you are free to get all the excellent nasty guy stuff,hit the toy isle and strip it clean of any cool HotWheel cars, and maybe some loud and extremely annoying toys for the children, ALL the favorite foods your wife LOVES but refuses to eat to avoid looking like a life raft with the rip cord pulled, and lots of really smelly cheese to go with the industrial size beer sale. Also if she needs something in powder form get liquid, basically do everything the dorks at the auto parts stores do to us on a food level when we order Buick parts. Then write the check for $30 over (did this one yesterday:Brow: ) and take the kids out to Sonic Drive In, like you didn't have any food.Well.......at least nothing that wouldn't make a billy goat hack :laugh: Give me a heads up on which recommendations of mine you used so I can prepare the proper defense. This post will self destruct in 455 seconds P.S. I miss my wife too........I'd hate to do this stuff to myselfou:
