Death

Discussion in 'The Bench' started by Guy Parquette, Apr 24, 2024.

  1. Guy Parquette

    Guy Parquette Platinum Level Contributor

    Just now learned my number one employee’s best friend died in a horrible car accident. This is obviously new to me. Tried calling him to talk. But won’t answer.
    How do I deal with him. He obviously is very distraught.
    I knew him very well also.
    I will give him all the time off as needed.
    Advice?
     
  2. RoseBud68

    RoseBud68 Well-Known Member

    Give him time. He seen your ID when you called. When he is ready he will call.
     
  3. dan zepnick

    dan zepnick Well-Known Member

    That's all you can do is give him time. Possibly go to his house for a welfare check?
     
  4. TrunkMonkey

    TrunkMonkey Totally bananas

    Leave him a message (if you haven't) telling him that you want to provide him as much time off and anything else he may need that you can provide.
     
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  5. Guy Parquette

    Guy Parquette Platinum Level Contributor

    that’s a good idea.
     
    dan zepnick likes this.
  6. Max Damage

    Max Damage I'm working on it!

    If he won't answer, leaving a nice message of support is good too. Sorry about this terrible situation.
     
  7. VET

    VET Navy Vet, Founders Club

    Sorry to hear your employee and friend is having a difficult time with the death of his best friend.
    It's expected he would be very depressed over this situation.
    Giving him time is the best cure for his well being.

    Maybe a Get Well Card from his friends at your work place might help. Shows him he is cared for and missed.
    Just a suggestion, hope I can help your situation. Vet
     
  8. hugger

    hugger Well-Known Member

    Agree just a short and to the point message letting him know to take his time and come back when he's ready...he doesn't need motivational quotes..scriptures...or a casserole rite now
     
  9. Mark Demko

    Mark Demko Well-Known Member

    Untimely deaths are the worst, they blind side you, it’s quite a shock, unlike a death from being ill, where it’s a slow progression.
    Prayers for your friend:)
     
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  10. Mister T

    Mister T Just truckin' around

    Offer your support in any way they wish, be that as much time off work to grieve as you're doing, an ear to listen, (and only listen) and perhaps few paid days off or paid professional grief counseling if he doesn't know how to deal with this. You might consider contacting a grief counselor for further guidance.

    He may be a different person after returning to work, depending on how he deals with this.
     
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  11. Mister T

    Mister T Just truckin' around

    Offer your support in any way they wish, be that as much time off work to grieve as you're doing, an ear to listen, (and only listen) and perhaps few paid days off or paid professional grief counseling if he doesn't know how to deal with this. You might consider contacting a grief counselor for further guidance.

    He may be a different person after returning to work, depending on how he deals with this.
     
  12. Mark Demko

    Mark Demko Well-Known Member

    GOOD ADVICE!
     
    VET likes this.
  13. Chuck Bridges

    Chuck Bridges Well-Known Member

    When my Dad passed, it was sudden and I was in College. I was top of my class with a 3.98 GPA. I got the call and we left Kamloops for Prince George, right away. After the funeral, I tried to go back to class, but, just sat there for about an hour. I went to the instructor, explained my problem, and he told me to take what time I needed. I told him I just cannot be there right now. A week later, I returned to class, caught up on the work, and sincerely appreciated the time I was give by my instructors.

    Give him time, he will contact you when he can speak without choking up. I was already retired when my son passed, or I don't know what would have happened.
     
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  14. Buicksky

    Buicksky Gold Level Contributor

    I am sorry for your loss. I think you should text mail and e-mail short message explaining what he can expect from you as a employer and friend. Then its up to him. Good Luck!
     
  15. accelr8

    accelr8 Well-Known Member

    I'm so sorry to hear! Prayers for you and your friend.

    Texting him to let him know you're there for him whenever he needs you and not to worry about work right now may be helpful to him.
     
    Guy Parquette likes this.
  16. Topcat

    Topcat Got TORQUE?

    I just lost one of my best friends of 40+ years.....death is the consequence of living......

    Be supportive of the person grieving and tell them.....cherish the memories of the times you shared with your friend but life goes on after they are gone.

    Peace WildBill
     
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  17. 12lives

    12lives Control the controllable, let the rest go

    Agree with all the above. If the funeral is local, go. Shake his hand and tell him how sorry you are.
     
  18. Ken Mild

    Ken Mild King of 18 Year Resto's

    Guy the number one best thing you can do is just be there and available to listen. Say your condolences from the heart, whatever else you are led to do, Flowers, time off etc., other than that, I have learned when people are suffering loss, a shoulder to cry on or a compassionate listening ear are the most valuable and appreciated things a grieving person can possibly receive.
     
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  19. Guy Parquette

    Guy Parquette Platinum Level Contributor

    He texted back. Seems fine
     
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  20. 436'd Skylark

    436'd Skylark Sweet Fancy Moses!!!!!

    If you don't have a bereavement policy for your business this would be a good time to get something together. It's good to have some structure in this department. Some folks like to take advantage of this sort of thing.
     

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