The Lone Ranger and Tonto went camping in the desert. After they got their tent set up, they fell sound asleep. Some hours later, Tonto wakes the Lone Ranger and says, "Kemo Sabi, look toward sky -- what you see?" The Lone Ranger replies, "I see millions of stars." "What that tell you?" asked Tonto. The Lone Ranger ponders for a minute, then says, "Astronomically speaking, it tells me there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three in the morning. Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What's it tell you, Tonto?" Tonto is silent for a moment, then says, "Kemo Sabi, you have many words and little insight. Someone has stolen tent."
The Lone Ranger and Tonto are riding through a canyon, in search of the Hole in the Wall Gang. Suddenly, across the canyon floor, there is a dust cloud. Indians on horseback! And on the warpath. Silver and Scout wheel around and our heroes see hundreds of war paint covered native Americans behind them, too. The Lone Ranger turns to Tonto and says "Indians! We are in trouble!" Tonto looks at him and says "What you mean, "we", paleface?"
The Lone Ranger and Tonto stop into the saloon for a drink on a hot summer day. The Lone Rangers horse is sweating so the Lone ranger tells Tonto to run around his horse to create a breezeso that he can get cooled off. A few minutes later a cowboy walks into the saloon and asks who owns the brown and white horse out front. The Lone Ranger stands up with his hand on his pistol and says "I do, Why do you want to know?" The cowboy answers "Just wanted to let you know that you left your Injun running"
bad jokes Where does the Lone Ranger take his trash? To the dump,to the dump,to the dump,dump,dump.... You can keep singing if you want. Sorry for that, my grandma told it years ago.
