I've got lotsa interesting stories over the years, but today I recalled a certain one while talking at work about our wilder days. I used to hang with this one dude, Roy. We road tripped often when we were seventeen/eighteen. After all, we were new to driving and there was a whole world to see. Rarely was there a destination as we constantly looked for old cars that we couldn't afford. We weren't trouble causers or nothing like that, but with all the trips we took, stuff was bound to occur. Its lost in my memory were this story took place. Near Charleroi PA I think. We were crusing on a four lane highway at night. Roys driving his 86 Cutlass. Someone behind us kept turning on his high beams. No flashing like a signal, but leaving them on for a minute at a time. We'd slow down, he'd slow down. We'd speed up, he'd speed up. After several miles of this, Roy was getting bigtime mad! Sudenly, the guy turns them on again, then dives of an exit. That was it, Roy wasn't letting him drive off. He locks the wheels up and backs up on the interstate. Then he tears down the same exit and procedes to chase this guy through town, fast. All the sudden this guy gets caught at a red light. So Roy whips the Cutlass around him and blocks him in. Roy gets outta the Cutlass and opens and closes his wallet real fast and says hes a cop! Then, in front of everyone at this well lit intersection (gas station at corner), Roy chews out this guy using a lot of big bad words. When Roy is finally done (seemed like forever)he hops back in the Cutlass and we pull away. I open the pass side door and hang outta the car making obscene gestures and yelling more big bad words! Now we made a scene, so it was time to git. We flew through town fast and started up an entrance ramp. Three quarter way up we realize its the wrong ramp. Roy locks em up again and starts backing down the ramp real fast (Roy was highly skilled at reverse high speed driving, but thats another story) Suddenly, we see headlights coming up the ramp. Roy pulls over quickly, then the rest of the lights turn on on the oncoming car. Yep, it was the cops! Roy was a gifted BSer as well, so he told me to sit there and shut-up, and he'd explain we were on the wrong ramp. So Roy gets outta the car and procedes to tell the officer something like "I just got on the wrong ramp and didn't want to get more lost". What the officer said next I'll remember always. He said "I DIDN'T PULL YOU OVER FOR THAT, I PULLED YOU OVER FOR WHAT YOU JUST DID IN TOWN"............................................Ulpou: That was it I thought. We are dead. So Roy goes into this rant, thinking ever so quickly, of blaming the other guy. Roy says we stopped to ask directions and the guy got belligerant. He further says that he drove off with me hanging out of the car so I wouldn't be able to beat the snot out of him. Odd is the occasion when a cop lets to dumb teens go on a BS story like that, but Roy new how to BS well and we went our way. To this day I can't believe we got away with that. Lets hear some of your stories.
OK, this one is nowhere as good as Dan's, but it still makes me chuckle. I was in my last year at the University of Connecticut and it was the first really nice day of spring, like mid March or so. Sunny out, first day you could open the windows while cruising. Tunes cranking, you know the scene. Me and a roomate were cruising in my '72 Cutlass and found a parking lot on the edge of campus where I proceeded to do many, many donuts. Peg leg or not, that car sure could do donuts! Anyway, we pull out and I notice an occifer behind me. Then the lights go on. I pull over, he comes up and asks for license and registration, and then says, "What was that 'dipsy doodle' back there?" His exact words, "dipsy doodle". I couldn't think of a thing to say and finally blurted out, "But officer, it's such a nice day!!". Brilliant, yes I know. He's goes back to his car and in my mirror I can see him and his partner laughing their butts off, obviously at my lame excuse. He comes back and says he isn't gonna give me a ticket *this time*, but what I did has been "duly noted". I looked him in the eye and said, "What? You got me down for a dipsy doodle?". He looked at me kinda pissed and just said "Get out of here!".
OK.. that right there made me actually laugh out loud! LOL :laugh: :laugh: Reminds me of a "brilliant" answer I once gave... It was in my younger days. I had a good job, and was rock-solid dependable to be at work on time every morning. I was quite the night owl / party animal back then, but always made it to work, bright eyed and bushy tailed one way or another. One morning (after a VERY late night of hard partying) I didn't get up until about 10AM (work started at 7AM) I come downstairs super hung-over. I found 3 messages on my machine (I never even heard the phone ringing) 2 were from my boss, and one from my mom. Everyone was worried and wondering where I was. (my boss called my moms place of employment to see if something happened to me) I stood there in a stupor for a minute wondering what to do, and feeling like crap, and too embarassed to call work. So I started a pot of coffee so I could think about how to handle this... The doorbell rings.... I answer it in my underwear, reeking of last night, and still not fully concious yet... It's my boss!! :shock: He say's "What are you doing?!?!" :eek2: My "brilliant" reply: "Waiting for the coffee", and pointed towards my kitchen :gt: That didn't go over too well. ou: ou: :laugh:
Looong tale! This doesn't really involve stupidity with cars, but it's funny nonetheless... Last April, driving back to class from lunch with 4 friends, we see a big tractor trailer sort of make a u-turn on the two lane road up ahead, right in front of the college, but we figured it was just backing into a driveway that we couldn't see. As we start pulling up closer, we realize that this tractor trailer is not moving. He's not backing up, or turning around. In fact, as we finally pull up to the truck, we find it stuck on the front lawn of the college. The driver has wedged himself into the grass: grass that is mucky from the snow that has just melted away a day ago. So, now this guy has his truck stuck in the grass, and his trailer is completely blocking off the main road in front of the college. We have two choices: we can turn around, go around the block and head to class, or we can stay, forego class and watch this truck driver PANIC (and why not? it is a beautiful day outside... the reason that the snow has melted). :laugh: We chose to park the car on the shoulder and watch the driver panic. The top of his front bumper is level with the top of the ground, and he is frantically going from 1st to Reverse to try and rock the truck out of his hole. It's obviously not working... in fact, it's just digging him deeper into the hole, but he doesn't seem to notice because he's *panicking!* The cool part is that he's also smoking his huge tires in the mud, making it all the more worthwhile to stay and watch. In the meantime, we've called the cops, realizing that he's blocking traffic (at noon, no less) and causing quite the headache for some drivers. Including some college students who thought they could drive around the truck on the college front lawn. ou: Good thing we're in a Jimmy, and have a tow rope. Once we pull about 5 cars off the college front lawn (including some cute girls who apparently didn't have much more brains than the truck driver) a guy in a CJ Jeep pulls up. He's a student, and has been watching the whole ordeal from the parking lot nearby. Oh man, this thing has got a huge cam! And this guy's intent is to pull this truck out of the mud. With a 304 AMC with an apparently huge cam. So, he hooks up his tow rope to the back of the truck, lets out the slack, and dumps the clutch. :shock: All our eyes widen and our mouths turn to grins as this guy proceeds to do a smokin' four wheel burnout with his 30+ inch mudder tires on a public street!!:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Could it possibly get any better? Well, no, I guess it couldn't have. The Jeep guy lets off, puts some slack into the rope, and then dumps his clutch again. Bad idea... the rope breaks. Thankfully, he slams on the brakes and no one was hurt. :eek2: And this is where the story starts to slow down (but not for the truck driver... he's still trying to rock the truck out). The police show up (after about 20 minutes), and once they stop the truck driver, we finally head back to class. To the 4 of us that stayed to watch, we called it the "Greatest Day Ever." Oh man, it was gold. Sorry for the length!!:Comp:
I think I've told these before, but I'll tell them again. First story is took place sophmore year in college w/ my '78 Impala, the Green Machine ( triple faded green 4 door, 250 straight 6). No class as there was about 8-12 fresh snow on the ground. Drove up to the stadium parking lot w/my buds and proceeded to do many donuts, figure 8s, and various slides. Best part was that I was doing the same thing many other vehicles were doing, only they were Pathfinders, Grand Cherokees, etc, and I didn't even have a posi in that thing. We also went up a snow packed hill.........in Reverse. That was a fun day. Second story also takes place after a snow dump, next year, in the Electra. No more classes for the day, so me and the guys go out for a drive on the back roads. I get to a long straight stretch w/ a big snow plow truck coming the opp. direction and hugging the center of the road. I moved over to far to the right and slide the boat straight into a snow covered ditch. Luckily some dude in a big Suburban showed up and pulled me out w/ a chain. My two friends paid the guy the $20 bucks he wanted and I proceded to drive them to the diner and bought dinner.
My friend Merrie had a 66 Chevy pickup truck and I had a 75 Camaro. I had just turned 18 (Merrie wasn't yet) and I stopped at this little tavern on Harrison St to buy some beer. We had both vehicles, for some reason and Michelle (who is the oldest but barely 4'6") was riding with Merrie. So I got the beer and Merrie is in front of me and turns left onto a side street. The only problem is that it isn't really a street there and I see Michelle go airborn as Merrie drives over the train tracks! No way am I going to try that in the Camaro! So I see the actual road a few feet to my right and Merrie recovers and gets behind me. The tears are rolling out of my eyes I am laughing so hard. There was no street sign there so I'm not sure what street I am on, but after I cross an intersection that should have had a stop sign I realize we are going the wrong way down a one way street! Merrie must have turned off, but I didn't see her do it. Just as I start to turn into a driveway to turn around I see headlights behind me and I assumed it was still Merrie & Michelle. So I get out to laugh at/with them but am greeted by an angry looking officer instead. :eek2: Now I hadn't had a beer yet - oh yeah, I had just gotten off of work (that's why we had 2 vehicles, Merrie & Michelle were cruising the park waiting for me). That jerk officer made me do the drunk test! :af: I said the alphabet in 4 seconds flat. He gave me a ticket probably because I rolled my eyes at him too many times.
My story starts out almost exactly as Dan's does: Im driving my '88 T-Bird TurboCoupe back in 1990 home from a friends house after a few :beer minding my own business doing 60 on a highway (Wantaugh pkwy North from Jones beach for those locals) somewheres around 1am....and this car catches up to me and starts tailgating and then he flips on his highbeams uzzled: By the lights, I could tell he was in a late 70's caprice I'm in the middle lane and theres no other traffic AND he has the left AND right lane to pass me in o No: Sooo.....I pull into the right lane to let him pass ....and He pulls over behind me :af: So, I pull back over through the middle lane to the left lane and he pulls in behind me At this point Im getting this really strong Pissed off feeling So I take my foot off the gas and start to slow ..... and he slows behind me. I switch from left to middle lane and then over to the right lane and STILL he's staying behind me and we're slowed to about 35-40 Now Im starting to get alittle freaked out by this whole thing and I decide running is my best option -so- I grab a handfull of second, the mighty-mite Turbo Spools and Im a gear bangin' maniac - Im acclerating as fast and furiously as I can At this point let me just say a thing or 3 about the T-Coupes - they were a GREAT car and alot of fun to drive (and were reported at the time to be able to break 140 easily in stock tirm). With the light weight of the Turbo-4 sitting in the nose, the car handled exceptionally well too. ....but it just wasn't as quick as it should have been. I got a good jump on him catching him unexpectedly but just managed to stay ahead of him as we hit 100mph. Then all of a sudden I started to pull ahead alittle bit at a time and by the time I was at 120, he definately couldn't keep up !! and the T-bird was ROCK steady so I just kept my foot Planted into the floor board !! I WAS GONNA OUTRUN THIS SOB !!!! ....but I ran out of highway first Wantaugh Parkway going north ends at Southern Parkway and there are two choices - 2 lanes go left , up and over on a tight left hander that could hold about 60 mph max -or- go right, on a single lane to a long gentle sweeping turn that could hold alot more speed. At 130+ From the left lane, at the last possible moment, I gently tugged the wheel to the right and I shot across 3 lanes to the long sweeping exit. There was no way he could follow and he didnt !! I Lost Him !!!! I started to haul the car down to SubLight speeds ....And found Mr. NYS Trooper sitting on the side of the road waiting for somebody.....anybody....me ?? Talk about spoiling the mood ou: ou: I pulled over, he came over and asked why I felt it was necessary to drive 110 mph on an exit ramp :spank: so i told him all about this LUNATIC oout of nowhere that starts chasing me !!! He took my papers and went back to his car. It was at least 15 minutes befor he returned When he came back over, he asked me if I could describe the other car....and i told him it was a late 70's big chevy. He asked me to tell him the whole story again, which I did..... ....and then he let me go !! Well.....it seems Mr. Lunatic met Mr. NYS Troopers' friend on the other exit ramp :gt: and didn't know anything about another car or chasing someone.....and they were getting arrested for some "Stuff" found inside the car o No: I've often wondered what exactly "Stuff" was on that night
Couple of cop stories. Summer before last, I was working at my summer camp, and coming back for the 1 AM counselor curfew at 12:50 or so in the Delta. I pull out from a stop sign and turn right, but the windshield is a bit fogged up, so I cross the center line a bit. There was this dude that was stopped to the left of me. So I get moving down this road (45 MPH, but turns into 30 MPH). He starts tailgating me. So I give him some of his own medicine and floor it, getting it up to 75 (now I'm in the 35 MPH). He gives me some room (or can't catch up...hope not to ruin the story, but it was a POS 4.6L), but is still pretty close. I hang a right onto the road the camp is on doing a 4 wheel drift (again, just me and the clown, no one else on the roads). By now, he's pretty far away because he didn't want to take a 90* turn at 40 MPH. So I go hauling down the road, and as soon as the lights come on, I hurl out some expletives and pull into the left-hand parking lot (right side of the road was a steep ditch). He saunters up and asks why I didn't pull over to the right because he could have been going past me and I would have caused an accident. I said that if he was tailgating me, he wasn't trying to get past me. Taking that into account, he said he's gonna give me a breathalyzer and maybe write me a ticket. I said OK to the breathalyzer and, naturally, blew .00. So I says, "You can't give me a ticket, or even a written warning because you were tailgating me and in court, it would be construed as making me speed and giving you a reason to pull me over." He gives in, and after checking my (spotless) record, agrees and drives off in a hurry. BTW, this was a state smokie. Ass... This last summer, same deal, but I was late coming back from lunch. I'm going around the lake, and go around a tight turn and speed up to 50 or so before I see a holstein driving in the opposite direction in one of those new wimpalas. OH CRAP! So I haul balls and see him turn off the road into another road. OK, so far so good, but just to make sure, I better get moving. So I get on it and do a road course run back to camp. Suddenly, I see him in my rearview all over the road trying to catch up to me. He finally does and hits his lights. I pull over, and it's a friend of my dad's. "Hey man, what's up?" he says that I was doing 49 in a 35 and to watch my speed because he had to really move to catch up to me. Yet again, a verbal warning. I love small towns.
Good stories guys (and Gals, Connie), My next one is one of the funniest that ever happened to me. I'm still seventeen at this point. I worked in the bakery at a Giant Eagle grocery store in Moon township PA. My friend Roy and I were in charge of making the Donuts. Remember that cause its the key part of this story. We'd go into the store around 4am and start. So one fine winter morning we decide to leave around 5am to get a real breakfast somewhere. We go outside and see that it snowed. There were only two cars in the lot, mine(79 Malibu 4 dr) and his. So we have a parking lot that was probably five acres with a complete blanket of snow all to ourselves. It was Donut time! Roys car was dead so we hoped in mine and proceded to drive like Evil Knivel for an easy half hour. I musta did fifty Donuts. After that we jumpstarted Roys car and waited in mine since it was warm. Just then a cop pulls up beside us and asks what we are doing. We say that we work hear. He ask's if we are coming or going. Leaving , we say. Then, with a dirty look, he asks "were youns the ones making Donuts" And Roy enthusiasticaly replys, YEAH THATS USou: .....................................The cop, in his best grumpy cop voice, say"don't let me catch you doing them again". He drives off. Then Roy realizes what he really meant. We laughed about that one for years.
My cousin Donna once went out with a guy named Tim. He was/is not a good driver, but he likes to go fast. One day, he was pulled over for speeding on the highway Officer: you know how fast you were going? Tim: No, sir Officer: 87 in a 55. Why were you going so fast, son?? Tim: that's all 5th gear has in this piece of s%!*.
One night, I'm drivng down Rt.3 west in Clifton, NJ in my T/R when I come upon a black Monte Carlo SS with dark tinted windows. I get behind him to see if he wants a little action and immediately he drives a little faster. So I too drove a little faster. Then he went a little faster still. I got into the middle lane and got next to him, but he wouldn't take off and run me. So I got in front of him and we drove along like that for 1/2 a mile. Then he got a little close to my rear bumper. So I drove a little faster. He drove a little faster. I drove a little faster. He drove a little faster. I drove a little faster (about 90 at this point). He.....turned on the flashing red lights hidden in his grille. ou: I felt so abused at that moment, I thought I was gonna be sick. He suckered me so bad and had me red-handed. I pulled over and this plain-clothes undercover detective with his shield hanging from his neck walks up to my car and says "What the hell are you doing?" I blurted out "I figured you wanted to race me!" ou: He gave me a strange look and asked for my papers. Ten seconds later he hands them back and says "Don't let me catch you speeding out here like that again! If I had my ticket book with me, you'd be getting one!" Then he hopped in his car, got off the exit, went over the overpass and went back the other direction. I asked around and come to find out...this guy was always out on Rt3 westbound in Clifton because it's an easy way to catch kids coming back from NYC carrying drugs. It's 10 miles due west from the city coming out of the Lincoln Tunnel and you can even see NY from high ground when you're driving eastbound in Clifton. I was just lucky he wasn't on speed patrol, instead of drug patrol. :TU:
couple quickies Highschool: Me and a buddy with a built `78 z28 ( looked like a$$ but ran like a burning cat ) just got our butts kicked by a 240z with a smallblock chevy conversion. We're turning and he says ' watch this ' and gets majorly sideways burning tire the whole way apparently right in front of a cop. Ticket for ' excessive acceleration '. Navy: Stationed in Norfolk and driving `84 camaro on the highway heading toward virginia beach with a buddy and get passed by a vette hauling some tail. With both of us doing well over 100 we blast past an offramp and see a state trooper backing up it in a hurry to get on the highway. We both slow down and a few minutes later the vette gets pulled over. Of course we think we've gotten off but a few minutes later we see another trooper on the feeder hauling butt to make it to the next offramp presumably to do the same to us. We nail it and get ahead of him because there is a split about 2 miles ahead with one fork going to virginia beach and the other to god knows where. We assume that he'll assume we're heading toward the beach so we take the other ramp and never see him again. Another instance in that camaro involved taking an offramp designed for 20mph sideways and at about 75 when the lane I was in terminated unexpectedly. Thankfully I have a stack of almost-bit-it stories and no actually- bit it ones.
Road Rage + Buick = Bad Combination!:eek2::grin: First car ('71 Skylark), after dropping off my girlfriend (now wife) after a date, about 11 PM. Going through an intersection, on my way home, looking ahead for other traffic (just staying aware, but not EXPECTING anyone else to be out), I notice a sideroad coming up on my right, and I KNOW that there IS a STOP SIGN there! There are 2 cars approaching the Stop Sign on the side road, about the SAME DISTANCE that I will get to the SAME POINT on the MAIN road. I am doing "70" (in a 55) in the Skylark (for me, that is NOT "speeding", it is just "CRUISING", and that is how I NORMALLY drive, always haveo No: ) I know that "I" have the RIGHT OF WAY, and I "know" that those cars are going to STOP (because they have to YIELD to ME, as I'm on the MAIN road).ou: I THOUGHT they were GOING to STOP, anyway!:eek2: The First car (a Ford Maverick with no plates, I can identify cars at night, too, by taillights, etc.) RAN THE STOP SIGN (never even SLOWED DOWN), AND TURNED RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME, in the lane that I was in!:af: I actually had to SWERVE into the LEFT LANE to AVOID hitting that car! Lucky for ME, that there were no "ONCOMING" cars, or I would've KILLED "SOMEBODY" (either the car that pulled out in front of me, OR the oncoming car, AND, most likely, MYSELF, too). As I'm now "alongside" this car, I am "cussing them out", and it's 2 "teenage" girls, and THEY are LAUGHING!:af: I SLAMMED on the brakes in the Buick, to get BEHIND them again. I "eased" the front bumper up to the rear bumper of their car, and I DOWNSHIFTED into SECOND GEAR, and FLOORED the gas pedal and shifted back into 3rd!:eek2: They Locked their brakes (trying to STOP, but I was PUSHING THEM DOWN THE INTERSTATE!:af: :Brow: :TU: ) That is when I was REALLY impressed with the Buick, and why I've collected them as long as I have: I couldn't BELIEVE that I had "THAT MUCH" POWER in the Skylark to be able to PUSH that little car with NO problem! EVEN with their BRAKES LOCKED, AT 90MPH (we were already doing 70, and I helped them to go faster!)!:laugh: I finally "backed off" and they pulled over on the side of the road. I pulled up alongside of them again, and they were CRYING, HYSTERICALLY! I just "nodded" to acknowledge that they understood the "mistake" that they had made, and went to leave. I looked in my rearview mirror, and noticed a pair of headlights coming up on me, FAST! It was the SECOND car that I saw on the SIDEROAD (it was their BOYFRIENDS!, and they saw the whole thing!o No: ) Instead of going home (I didn't want them to follow me home to know WHERE I LIVE), I went to my closest buddy's house, and he was having a "Party" (so ALL of my High School Buddy's were there!) :Brow: When I pulled up in front of the house, and got out of my car, and went in the house, I explained what had just happened to my buddies. They suggested that we take the party "OUTSIDE".:grin: About 30 of us walked out in the front yard, and we noticed a Ford Ranger driving back and forth (looking at MY car), and as soon as they saw ALL of us, the "2" guys just LEFT!:laugh: I've always wondered if that girl ever "ran a stop sign, or pulled out in front of someone" again.o No: I don't think she did.:TU:
A couple... I had one similar to Alan's. It was one of the first nice evenings of summer & I was cruising River Road. Its a winding road thru trees with rolling hills and a view of the river. Nice drive. I didn't notice that a car was coming & popped a hill only a few car lengths away from him with my high-beams on. I fumbled to dim my lights (managing to turn on the wipers, the cruise, and the right signal...) but we passed without me dimming. On the way by I noticed the car was a beat-up late 80's Impala. About a mile later there's now a late-80's Impala right on my bumper - with the high beams on. Oh great, I po'd some drunk or nut case. I kept going nice & easy waiting to see what he was going to do. I slowed down a little & he almost rammed me. At the time I had a mild 327 in my Regal. I knew it wouldn't out-accelerate the Impala by much, buy I'd have way more top-end without the computer limiting it. I usually launched the car on a roll by slamming first & punching it at the same time. I had my hand on the shifter just waiting for the curve to straighten out......bang - on go the cherries.... I wasn't more than a second away from running on a cop. YIKE! and WHEW! Seems I had slowed to 35 when the speed limit dropped to that from 45, but sped back up again. He had clocked me from a hiding spot in the trees. I admitted to being kinda daydreaming enjoying the evening & wasn't paying that close of attention. Since I had slowed down initially I got off with a warning. Another short one - In high school I worked at a Kentucky Fried Chicken. One night I'm walking across the parking lot and a cop pulls up blocking my path and stops. "You work here?" .....I'm wearing one the goofy paper hats, that southern bow-tie thing, a shirt with 'Kentucky Fried Chicken' embroidered on one side, a nametag on the other, and carrying a trash can towards an open dumpster...... I stood there for a couple seconds, not quite sure what to say. I finally came back with "No, I like to break into restaraunts to steal their uniforms and garbage." "Don't get smart with me!" was the reply. The first thing that crossed my mind was "that'd be near impossible with the questions you're asking", but I held back. Didn't seem prudent considering the tone of her voice. I just quietly walked around the back of her car & dumped my trash.
I have a story kinda. Alcohol induced of course. Ok so there are four of us. The wife and I and one of my buddies and whatever girlfriend he had at the time. All piled into his regular cab pick-up and leaving a dance that we went to in Colo. about an hour from home. We got there by hearing that a couple of our friends were gonna be playing it while we were at another bar 30 miles away,lol. Needless to say we didn't need to be there and we really didn't need to be driving. SO, the dance is over at bar number 2, and we walk outside to go home. Look around and awwwwwww look, it's snowed about 3-4 inches. Somehow it was decided that yours truely was the safest bet to drive home. OK reach into the cooler, one more can of "stupid" in a can and I'm ready. Look around noones coming, so do an illegal to go the direction that I want to go. BUT WAIT !!! we need more beer and if we hurry we can get to the store before they close. SO about a block from the first slightly illiegal u-turn, I make another. I guess I should add that these "u-turns" I am describing are basically a stab the gas and slightly steer to help the p/u into the slide needed :Brow: . Ok so we made 2 "u-turns" and are in front of the store, closed ! Dammit I thought they were opened , OH well lets get home, we have more there, and enough to get us there. That means we need just 1 more of the afore mentioned "u-turns" in the fresh snow,lol. So I did. I made it about a block and of course here comes the lights. Seems the local copper was sitting watching us and finally we drove in front of him, thus opeing his window of oportunity. As is normal, everyone is all of a sudden REALLY quiet,lol, and I just know this is gonna be bad. About that time my buddy says " Dave, are you ready?" and I half yelled "hell yes" with the window going down to talk to the approaching officer. When I yelled the girls both jumped like they had been shot at, and my buddy and I go headlong into this whole, top of your lungs fight about which direction it is to get the blank outa this (blankety, blank) town. And NO you are a blankin' MORON and don't have any idea where the blank you are......"oh just a second officer"...... you stupid blankin idiot and now I am gonna get a blank ticket because you can't make up your blankin mind with your "blank" directions...... I'm sorry sir what did you say ? ....... No we're trying to get home and this blankin' blank is giving me all these directions and I have no idea where the blank I am........(look at buddy and call him a dirty name while attempting to volunteer my license to officer). Then the officer says, where are you trying to get ? I tell him, and he looks at my buddy and says " your buddy here is right, you don't have any blankin' idea where you are". He then proceeds to give me my directions( that I knew all the time:Brow: ) and tells me not to listen to my buddies all the time. We made it about 5 miles outa town with the girls looking at us like we really hated each other. Then I pulled over, went to the cooler and got a couple "bubblies" for us and my bud and I looked at each other and started laughin and high 5'n ............... The girls had NO idea that this wasn't the first "showing" of such hatred between myself and one of my best friends. But it was their first time having front row seats..........Thanks guys for the stories, I had forgotten about that till I read some of yours.
During my undergrad at the University of Toledo I was complaining how they don't get much snow in that area, when one night we had a slight flurry that didn't stick... ...except for the top of the parking garage - about an inch or so. So I drove up there to do some donuts, and like an idiot, left my headlights on. A campus cruiser came up just as I got stuck. He was very polite (except for asking how much I had to drink b/c he "smelled" alcohol on my breath - I'd not had a drop). He told me I shouldn't be doing that, its dangerous, etc. It was quite civil between us. However, more cars showed up - about 3 more cruisers. Before he let me go he said, "Oh, those other cars aren't for you - they had to ask me something." I didn't say anything, but was thinking, "suuure, they just want to see the idiot doing donuts on the parking garage."
I was a sophmore in college and they had just called classes for snow, a rare treat. Two buddies and I got in my '71 GS 350 and started doing full-on donuts in various fresh parking lots. Well, it is snowing so hard and we can hardly see where we are going. After marking up a really big parking lot that we stumbled upon, we find an exit and leave. It is only then that we notice it is a church parking lot right next to the state police post!
Alcohol induced of course. Back in the service days 78-82 we had a group of GI's that were nicknamed "Johns Garage" by the police, we all liked to drink beer and lots of it!!! Well one night it was about in the 40's and we all left the hotrods home to ride around in a Honda CRX It was the smallest honda they offered. Well six of us were in the car I rode in the middle front and shifted gears while someone else was wheeling around. AS we got drunker one of us figured out that a shopping cart fit perfect in the front bumper guards. Well In Ogden Utah at the top of this one road there is about a 1 mile road on a grade down towards about 40% down (or up) so we took a cart and it lined up on the front we pushed it out of the supermarket parking lot towards the down side of the hill. The cart was fine as we reached about 60 MPH and we started to pass the car in the slow lane. That car was doing the 40 MPH speed limit and as we reached the 1/4 panel the honda brakes were slammed on so we could travel beside it and the shopping cart went on to pass the slower car. It even went on to change lanes and stay in that lane for a few seconds then went to the gravel lane:laugh: Well as the driver watched his mouth was open and all the passengers were watchin the cart go by and then as it rolled the driver rips his head around to see us all laughing VERY loudly at this ordeal so the front passenger hung out the window and kinda did his imppression of a spaz by flapping his arms and screaming at the car . Well then we took off laughing even more!!! About 10 minutes later about 20 squad cars ran up on us with all the redlights on and pulled us out one by one to look at us to be ID'd by the driver........................................yup thats right it was a cop on the way to work.....:spank: Well we all had military jackets on so he couldnt but they knew it was us but had to let us go. I guess we scared his family. He did say the cart thing was funny after the thing rolled away from the road.............................
another good one There was a 65 Skylark in town I was trying to buy. The guy who drove it worked about a 1/2 block south of where I did. He drove the car to work fairly often, so I'd stop down to talk to him about it. Since he was at work, I tried to keep the conversation short & would leave after 5 minutes or so (remember that). Eventually he fessed up it wasn't actually his car, but his girlfriends. He didn't think she'd sell because she was pumped up about restoring it herself. He introduced us though. After that I focused on convincing her to sell it. Every few weeks I'd drop by her apartment for that same 5 minutes or so (remember that too). This pattern kept up for a good 8-10 months. In the meantime, I'd occasionally feel like I was being followed. I'd go somewhere and notice that when I left, there'd be a car there that had been at the previous place I'd been. One day I was out for a drive, just enjoyin' the day and kept seeing this green Chrysler behind me. Over and over again. I decided to test him a little & went to an area with "real" blocks to drive around (Bismarck is big on "Lanes", "Drives", "Loops", etc. Only the older parts of town have normal 'square' blocks.). I made three right turns. And there he was in the mirror again... So I did it again. Still there. GAME ON!!! I casually drove to an area I used to bike-ride a lot when I was younger. It was more typical Bismarck twisty streets with occasional deep intersections for water drainage. Its an area that'd be very easy to overdrive if you didn't know the neighborhood. :Brow: :Brow: As expected, a few sudden high speed manuevers & Mr. Mopar was no longer a part of my day. This happened a few more times with me either losing them in some neighborhood or just flat outrunning them depending on what the car was. I was a little spooked about it, but it was kinda fun too... :laugh: Back to the Skylark... Finally one spring day the owner broke. She'd gone to the junkyard to get a different dashpad. Frustrated that she couldn't figure out how to remove it, she realized she didn't have the knowledge to rebuild the car. With spring rain & wet the rear window had started leaking as well & was dripping on the backseat. She needed a better car for her kids and wanted my 81 Regal in exchange. I didn't like that Regal & was happy to trade. FINALLY!! About two weeks later I drop by to visit Mom. First thing she does is hands me the newspaper. "There's a story you may find interesting." It was meant to be a humor article, and I did smile at it for a fraction of second... Seems there was this lady suing her ex-boyfriend for expenses she incurred over something-or-other because of him. She won by default because he didn't show up for the trial. He tried, but was arrested outside. They nabbed her too, but on the way out. The cops thought it was nice of them to bring themselves to the courthouse like that. Anybody guess what they were arrested for? Numerous counts of selling & delivering drugs. :shock: uhoh. uh... Remember all those quick stops every couple of weeks to check on the car? Gee, no wonder I'd been tailed. And I followed up that suspicious behavior by playin' games with the tail they had on me. And for an encore, I traded a decent looking 81 Regal for an obviously needing TLC 65 Skylark. Oh, wunnerful. :gt: :gt: I was sweatin' bad for months after that. I worried I was going to lose the car now 'cuz they used it in some drug run or something. I worried I'd be pulled over & they'd find 'leftovers' hidden in the car somewhere. I worried about being pulled in for questioning, etc etc. Nothing ever did come of it. When I tore the car down to start the restoration I didn't find any surprises either. :laugh: :laugh:
