haha... I was e-mailed this... They're not really jokes so I don't think they belong in that thread... but they're still pretty neat. Corporate Lessons... >> >> CORPORATE LESSON 1 >> >> A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her >> shower when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel >> and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next >> door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, 'I'll give you $800 >> dollars to drop that towel." >> >> After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked >> in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 dollars and >> leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When >> she get to the bathroom, her husband asks, "Who was that?" >> >> "It was Bob the next door neighbor" she replies. >> >> "Great!" the husband says. "Did he say anything about the $800 he owes >> me?" >> >> Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to the >> credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position >> to prevent avoidable exposure. >> >> ----------------------- >> >> >> CORPORATE LESSON 2 >> >> A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to >> lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes >> out. The Genie says, "I'll give each of you just one wish." >> >> "Me first! Me first!" says the admin. clerk. "I want to be in the >> Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world." Poof! She's >> gone >> >> "Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing >> on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas >> and the love of my life." Poof! He's gone. >> >> "OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, "I want >> those two back in the office after lunch." >> >> Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say. >> >> --------------------------- >> >> >> CORPORATE LESSON 3 >> >> A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A rabbit asked him, >> "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?" >> >> The crow answered, "Sure, why not?" >> >> So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. A fox jumped >> on the rabbit and ate it >> >> Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting >> very high up. >> >> -------------------------------------- >> >> >> CORPORATE LESSON 4 >> >> A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the >> top of that tree", sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy." >> >> "Well, why don't you nibble on my droppings?" replied the bull "They're >> packed with nutrients." >> >> The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it gave him enough >> strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after >> eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a >> fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon >> he was spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree. >> >> Moral of the story: B.S. might get you to the top, but it won't keep you >> there > Edit: and lesson number five... learn to spell... because you can't change it in the topic. ou:
